It occurred to me today that not only haven’t I written a post forever…but I also know a lot of people with new bubs. These two things are in no way related, just so you know.
And while I love oohing and aahing about everyone’s cute new little bubs, it does always make me catch my breath when I think about what these mum’s must be going through.
All the well-meaning advice, the old wives tales, the myths, the conflicting information can really be enough to send you off the deep end.
So I’m here to bust some common myths that drive me a little bit bonkers and put a lot of pressure on new mum’s that feel torn between what they want to do and what they’re told to do.
This doesn’t mean that I think the below is something all mum’s should do, but if you want to do it you need to know it’s okay and your child isn’t going to go through their teenage years still wanting to breastfeed and sleep in your bed….if they do you might want to seek help, urgently.
- Cuddling your baby to sleep will not mean that they still want to cuddle you to sleep when they are teenagers, it would make for an awkward sleepover situation;
- Breastfeeding your baby past the age of one will not make it impossible to wean them (see here), will not make them introverted…but it might kill off your boobs (I’m living proof and secretly can’t wait until menopause, as my mum reassures me that’s when my boobs will magically reappear – fingers crossed);
- Breastfeeding your baby to sleep does not mean that they won’t be able to settle once you wean them. They will, they’re more versatile than you think.
- Having your baby sleep with you (in a safe way of course, we used to put them in a baby sleeping bag on top of our blankets and only when they could easily lift up their head) will not mean that they will want to sleep in your bed forever. Both of ours are out, albeit the youngest pops in for early morning snuggles most mornings.
- It’s okay to have a strict routine, but it needs to be flexible too because life is unpredictable. Your baby will cope with change if you lead the way. If you’re anxious about it then they will be too.
- Day time naps aren’t for every child, my kids are living proof that a child can ditch the daytime nap at a young age (read 18 months…and yes I did cry long and hard about it) and still function academically and physically at a high level. Don’t sweat it.
The best advice I ever received was from a work colleague. When I rang her in tears that my eldest wasn’t ‘conforming” she said ditch the books and do “whatever works for you. If that means driving to the Sunshine Coast and back (this was clearly before petrol became gold) so he sleeps, then do it.”
BEST. ADVICE. EVER!
P.S. Here’s another post I wrote busting the “perfect parent myth”, it’s quite shocking.